Love is a Verb by Gary Chapman
223 pages
This book consists of stories of love. I enjoyed the stories and I also felt like many of the stories were ones that I could have told. I have recapped what each story has to say about love.
- Loving generously causes unforgettable rewards. Caring for someone not only benefits the other person but can cause a ripple effect creating an experience of community.
- Verbal apologies are important and can cause much needed healing when expressed.
- Love has the ability to adapt. When faced with difficulties, love has a deep reservoir that can be drawn from.
- Small gestures can make our lives and the lives of others a better place.
- The saying “Familiarity breeds contempt” tends to be true. When we spend hours of hours of time with someone we begin to see all kinds of faults. The trick to get past this is to close our eyes to the irritating factors of a person and focus on their positive attributes and before long that is all we will see.
- It is human nature to withhold and wait to give until we are sure we will benefit. Sometimes the best thing to do is take the first step yourself and see the changes that can take place.
- Compromise is not bad. Being flexible, understanding, and showing the ability to support the other is necessary for the relationship to grow and develop.
- Love is not always convenient. Willing to accept interruptions and intrusions into our lives in relationship with others can open up all kinds of possibilities.
- There is nothing new under the sun. Checking resources and being teachable – being open to listen to others will enable us to move outside our struggles and begin to seek help to make it through the issue causing tension.
- The capacity to love is not limited as long as we are willing to take a chance. It may cost us at times but the result well exceeds the expense.
- Never give up to soon on the person you care about.
- When we love, sacrifice becomes a way of live. It is not the grand gestures, but in the small daily choices that are made when we set aside our own desires for someone else.
- It is hard to love when a person is in pain or has addictions. The first step in showing love is to nurture them and take care of their basic needs. Patience is a must. And when they lash out do not take it so personally. Love is stubborn. By the grace of God we can find love strong enough in this situation.
- Love looks different to people. Discover how the other person feels loved to learn their love language.
- Love your enemies and do good to those who hate you. Consistent good deeds give proof of a changed heart. When a relationship feels more like a battle then do good deeds to instill new hope and life and friendship in the relationship.
- Love can be hidden. We may have to dig up painful memories and renew relationships but if we discover hidden love then unexpected rewards might happen.
- Love often means coming to the rescue when a person we care for needs us.
- Looking at other’s needs and desires and preferences can turn relationships into win-win situations.
- Learn to love despite the outward appearance, and an unexpected jewel may be found.
- Abuse is not acceptable, but love looks beyond the painful past of a person we love and look into a hopeful future.
- The more we learn to love the more we want to show that love.
- Adding romance to the core of your love takes time but well worth the effort.
- To love others means to free them from our unreasonable expectations.
- Every person has positive and negative traits, no matter how seldom we notice the negative ones. Love does not mean for us to wear blinders but to take the good with the bad.
- People change. Learning to love new personalities in familiar skin takes courage. It means not only loving who the person was but also embracing who the person has become.
- Love does not require for us to have all the answers. Instead many times love just asks for us to listen to the problem.
- It’s not about me. The best relationships are those in which we decide that everything should revolve around the other person.
- We can not control anyone else in a relationship situation. But we can pray for the best.
- Sincere complimentary words are valuable.
- Relationships go through seasons. Just hang in there when the going gets tough.
- Sometimes we wear ourselves out “doing” in a relationship. Sometimes it is better to just be with someone instead of always doing.
- Sometimes it is hard for us to rest in the assurance that live is true especially if we feel we are not giving as well in return. When we are willing to trust another’s love, we can take the risk to be authentic.
- When it comes to fighting in a relationship, pick your battles wisely. Only use emotional energy on things that really matter.
- Love is a perspective. Focus on the heart and then it is not hard to overlook another person’s mistakes and failings.
- Stable, mature love is deeper than emotional words and displays of affection. The words and touches are nice but they are not everyone’s way of expressing love. The key is to change our expectations to something that is reasonably within our loved one’s personality.
- A relationship takes 100% not 50%. The more we give of ourselves the more we receive. The less we expect of others, the more we get.
- The key to weathering the storms of life is to nurture your relationships every day.
- Putting hatred and revenge to death and choosing to love can sometimes bring new life to the person we chose to love. Regardless, choosing to love, we choose to shed pain and find more abundant lives ourselves.
- People who are tough to love are often tough to love for a reason. Realizing we are not the problem frees us. It lets us look beyond ourselves and keep trying to build a relationship without thinking we are the one who is doing something wrong.
- Love is an act of faith.
Reflections 